To : Ng Choon Cheat

~ What A Cute and handsome guy?! He's really a good man _

~ I felt he is strong, but who will clear his moments of weakness? _

~ Why should we take away his life so early? He did not fault! _

In the afternoon, I received a message from SisJoAnn : "SiewWen, Cheat had passed away..."... I'm really get shocked while knowing such a bad news! The handset which holding in my hand almost fall. I can't accept this breaking news! So I called her immediately! don't know why, I cried seriously... can't control myself anymore. She had told me that he was suffering from bone cancer a few months ago. During the period, he tried to surgery, but in the end the cancel cells is still proliferate. Please! He was just 21 years old!! SisJoAnn tried to comfort me and helped me how to contact his friend to let me pray my last respect for him. After hung up the phone, the past kept flashing back in my mind...

My mind now was totally empty now. I can't even believe to this badly news. Suddenly, I felt so sorry to him, how can I do not ask about him at all such a long time?! How can I do that? ya, I'm blaming myself! I'm right to blame myself!!!　I'm really bad!! I was too late to apologize anymore. I didn't have such qualification to being forgive by him. I knew... I have nothing can say already, every words in my heart had blocked, it choose to runny eyes non-stop. I think this is the best way for me to relieve my hurt hidden deeply in my heart! By the way, I just hope that I can pay my respect for him at the end of his life. May God Bless Him

At night, I went to his house to pay my last respect for him with SyeLi. Although I'm scared to see those unfamiliar faces, but I feel calm when I saw his portrait there. I got so many things to tell him, I wish he can forgive me such a stupid failure, but when I kneel to his body, I'm down and nervous, I have don't know what to say first and next. Anyway, I will never know the answer anymore. How sad am I?!

When I reached home, I realized that no one will reply me anymore if I sending some funny message or telling him I'm bored or upset. Why?! I'm really can't accept the truth at all!

My tears was dried, but my friends still feel my sadness even I'm smiling to them, now I just know how good are you. You had made my cry! What you do for me, I'm appreciated, but too late for reciprocation. :(

Gor, I do miss you...

really miss you.....

Rest In Peace

*cry